August 5, 2007
Bring On the Swanky Glaze
Desperation for food and cold drinks can lead to places like this
By Stephen Bailey

OK, I'm not saying that Señor Swanky's (142 Bleecker St, NYC) is a bad place to eat. I'm just saying it's a big, loud, ugly, fast, taco and margarita place to eat. It's not somewhere I would go for a typical dinner, but it seemed like a good idea for semi-late-night summer munchies and cold drinks. It would turn out to be far more amusing than anyone could have predicted.

My friends Nelson and Debbie had met me at The Baggot Inn a little while earlier. The lack of air conditioning and cold beer combined with their need for food meant we were out on the streets searching for a place to go. The words 'quick' and 'inexpensive' were tossed around as we made our way over to Bleecker Street.

Heat and hunger will often work together to thwart any real ability to make decisions. Pizza was mentioned, as were burgers and finally Mexican. Out of sheer desperation we simply picked the first place we saw. The apparent 'celebrity hang out' that is Señor Swanky's lured us in like a car wreck on the side of the road. We just could not resist the simple Mexican border town motif of the outside area and the promise if cheap food. No celebrities though.

Apparently the inside is in fact quite swanky, but we were outside among the yellow walls and umbrellas and blue trim. There was a baby running around in an area where even adults should not be allowed to walk unaccompanied. I was expecting a disaster that never came. Well, except for Debbie's humorous attempts to order dressing for her salad. A salad that for some reason had to be designated as 'vegetarian'.

Nelson ordered the ever-safe cheese enchiladas and I got the obscene sounding Mexican Love Sticks with Swanky Glaze. Imagine my disappointment when a simple basket of skewered beef and chicken arrived. I was not disappointed in the taste, rather in the sheer lack of perversion in the presentation. All the while, whenever Debbie would decide on a dressing, several minutes would pass before the waiter came out to say, "We don't have that." She was finally able to enjoy some sort of carrot dressing concoction.

We ordered our margaritas (or Swankaritas if you will) and made light of the whole situation. After all, the food was not bad really and the waiter did buy us a round of drinks to make up for the pitiful salad dressing selection. Plus I discovered that, after all these years of ordering my margaritas on the rocks and no salt, that I actually like the salt. This was thanks to the bartender accidentally salting my glass. I do still prefer 'on the rocks' vs. 'frozen' because they feel less like a Slurpee and more like a proper cocktail.

So some accidents are a good thing. If the Baggot Inn wasn't having coolant problems we would have never come to this place. If the kitchen had the dressing they advertised, we would have never gotten our comp drinks. And had I insisted on sending back my salted margarita, I would have lost out on a forgotten taste. And on top of it all, I got to spend some quality time with good friends outside on a summer night in NYC.

Links:
Señor Swanky's
Adventures in Foodland
Debbie's take on the night
Stephen Bailey